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16 April 2007 @ 06:56 am
"We're all going to die!" vs. "We're all going to be horribly maimed!"  
Here I sit in my favorite airport in the whole world. Leaving ample time for travel delays of course ensured that everything went smoothly, thus allowing me plenty of time to soak up the ambiance. Having already availed myself of some OJ from one of the kiosks (*premium* OJ, no less...I can only assume the ice cubes floating therein are premium as well), there's not much else to do but blather on a journal.

I can't help but notice that, as with at least the last two flights from here, they have an announcement repeated pretty regularly. Some gent speaks in the most dire tones:
"Ladies and gentlemen, the Department of Homeland Security has raised the threat level to...ORANGE!"
I'm serious, they leave just enough space before the word 'orange' for my brain to fill in the proper "Dun-dun-DUUUUUNNNN". Of course, a nit-picker might observe that 'raised' is a bit of a misnomer, as that would imply it being lower in recent memory.

It's a bit of a moot point anyways, as they have elected to use a two-point scale; essentially 'screwed' and 'hyper-screwed'. If they ever see fit to lower it to blue or green before scrapping the program, I'll eat my hat. I don't have a hat.

I'll eat feren's hat. I'm sure he won't mind.

Anyways, I've apparently wasted enough time typing on this matchbook-sized keyboard that we're boarding. Is it too early to order gin?
Otter: Mmmm beer!ottr on April 16th, 2007 12:05 pm (UTC)
I believe that is American Airline's motto. It's never too early for gin.
Legal Assassingravecat on April 16th, 2007 03:36 pm (UTC)
Damnit, I was about to say that. ;D
Brendan: DRINK!roho on April 16th, 2007 08:44 pm (UTC)
Curses! I received these sage words after already landing. I'll bear them in mind on the flight back on Thursday, though, which is also in the morning.
Hey, or maybe a Bloody Mary! That's legit breakfast booze :D
Fiskfiskblack on April 16th, 2007 02:51 pm (UTC)
The color coding system is less important for ordinary folks. Each code-level corrosponds to a certain level of required security precautions for local law enforcement. If it's yellow, it requires X number of people doing Y, with Z number of security on call for whatever. Changing the level to orange changes the numbers and security layers. So it's really more important to people who are involved in security. To people who just wander through, it will seem silly.
Legal Assassingravecat on April 16th, 2007 03:39 pm (UTC)
This is what I never understood, though. While not being American and having my own opinions on the whole terrorism issue, one fact still remains: They can't really know for sure exactly how much danger there is at any given time, so doesn't it make more sense to have everything nice and secure at all times of the year, instead of going, "Actually, guys, we don't think there'll be any danger today. You three can go home."

Especially as it's announced, at that. You'd think the counter-productive forces that be would just wait for a low moment to strike. Or am I just missing the point entirely, and that's precisely why it always seems to be yellow or above?
Fiskfiskblack on April 16th, 2007 03:45 pm (UTC)
They can't really know for sure exactly how much danger there is at any given time, so doesn't it make more sense to have everything nice and secure at all times of the year

No, because it costs lots of money to keep people on duty and such. So they adjust security levels based on any intelligence they have that can allude to possible terror operations.
Legal Assassingravecat on April 16th, 2007 03:51 pm (UTC)
Hmmm, yeah, I guess that makes sense. Thanks for filling me in.
M. C. A. Hogarthhaikujaguar on April 16th, 2007 02:56 pm (UTC)
It may be too early for gin, but it's never too early for... KNOB CREEK. |)
Brendan: DRINK!roho on April 16th, 2007 08:45 pm (UTC)
Mmmm...morning brrrrbun!
C'mon, just have one more little glass ;)
Legal Assassingravecat on April 16th, 2007 03:37 pm (UTC)
Maybe they should have just started the scale at yellow, and worked it up from there. Yellow, red, purple, black, knives in the eyes. The top level would certainly do a good job of scaring people, which may or may not be the actual intention.

Pain is scary, after all.
midwestcougarmidwestcougar on April 16th, 2007 04:50 pm (UTC)
It's five o-clock somewhere in the world, drinky-drinky. =^.^=
Araquan Skytracer: Computer stupidityaraquan on April 16th, 2007 05:09 pm (UTC)
I've thought about modding my DHS threatlevel script to control a hardware device that, rather like the DEFCON signals in WarGames, displays the current threatlevel. I mean, after all, if we're supposed to keep track of all this crap, why not do so with an attractive wall-mountable device that keeps me appraised of the threat level in real time?

Of course, it then occurred to me to save money in its construction by simply omitting the Blue and Green levels, because they will simply never be used...
Feren: ashryn-blahblahblahferen on April 18th, 2007 01:53 am (UTC)
You can't have my Browning hat. Or my Final Grade hat.

You can eat all the $EMPLOYER hats you want, tho.